Survey; (Stolen.From.Beth)

Only answer True or False

Q: Kissed someone? true
Q: Been arrested? false
Q: Kissed someone you didn't like? true
Q: Do you like someone? true
Q: Held a snake? true
Q: Been suspended from school? false
Q: Been fired from a job? false
Q: Sang karaoke? true
Q: Done something you told yourself you wouldn't? true
Q: Laughed until you started crying? true
Q: Caught a snowflake on your tongue? true
Q: Kissed in the rain? false
Q: Sang in the shower? true
Q: Sat on a roof top? false
Q: Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on? false
Q: Broken a bone? false
Q: Shaved your head? false

LAST PERSON.
1. You hung out with? ahhhh Colleen and Steven on saturday... We went for sushi
2. You texted? I dunno really... That's hard because I lost my phone like 3 weeks ago.
3. You were in a car with? Mom, Bina and auntie Cindy
4. Went to the movies with? Beowulf with Auntie Marie and Trish
5. You went shopping with? myself......
6. You talked on the phone? Beth
7. Made you laugh? Uhhhh Either Alex or Reece.
8. You hugged? Wyatt
9. You cried in front of? Ummm Family I think
10. Where do u live? Ft Mcmurry
11. Club or Pub? ummm I dunno
12. Are there 1 or 2 ppl who u can always trust and rely on? I hope so. But for most things yes I believe so.
13. Do you want to get married? Hopefully someday. If I can find the right guy... If there is such a thing.
14. Do you twirl your spaghetti or cut it? Twirl all the way.
15. What time is it? 5:19 pm
16. Are u afraid of commitment? Most likely yes
17. Would you have a party? Oh yeah. Provided that nobody got hurt or smashed the place.
18. Do You cook? occasionally
19. Current mood? Confused

IN THE LAST 48 HOURS HAVE YOU...
1. Kissed someone? Nope.
2. Sang?Of course
3. Listened to music? Most Deininitly
4. Seen someone you care a lot about? Really cared about not really... Other than family of course.
5. Danced Crazy? Hxc. Everyday.
6. Cried? Ummm nope. Almost though.
7. Like someone you can't have? Yup.

Fairy-Tales and Tragedy

He was her knight in aluminum armor
Guiding the way with his iPod torch
Both in shambles and broken
But neither really knew

She was a damsel, always in distress
Her knight was there whenever she called
In the middle of a storm or in the middle of the night
he was always there with his mechanical steed.

What a fairy-tale life they had
a princess and her knight
always depending on each other
when the other needed them most.

but where did it all go wrong?
A look, a touch, a feeling.
silly little princess
she fell in love.

She could never admit it
no matter how many people said its true
she refused to believe their words
her mind said no but her heart said yes

she told her knight her secret
he shook his head and walked away
where are they now?
back where they started, broken and alone

Maybe thats why the princess never falls in love

Your Guardian Angel-Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

Your Guardian Angel
Red Jumpsuit Apparatus


When I see your smile
Tears run down my face I can't replace
And now that I'm strong I have figured out
How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul
And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.

Seasons are changing
And waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you I'll be the one

I will never let you fall (let you fall)
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Cuz you're my, you're my, my, my true love, my whole heart
Please don't throw that away
Your Guardian Angel
Cuz I'm here for you
Please don't walk away and
Please tell me you'll stay, stay

Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know I'll be okay
Though my skies are turning gray

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Watch the fire burn out.
Watch the curtain start to close.
Waiting on the final words,
Your heart already knows.

The hate for the end of the day
Knowing that it was all in vain
Praying for the peace
But only feeling the pain

Crazy little words
That everyone wants to hear
“I miss you”. “I love you”.
They always leave me with fear.

Those words never came easy
When they did I knew they were true
Few can make me say them
And the biggest one is you.

I have never wanted anything
More than I do today.
Time is cutting short
To say want I need to say.

Watch the fire burn out.
Watch the curtain start to close.
Waiting on the final words,
your heart already knows.

I miss you, I love you

Please, please always know.

Jimmy Robbins

Breathe Again - Jimmy Robbins

She's got this journal filled
with all her black ink guilt
and love is the only thing keeping her alive
she's got her mind made up
that all she needs is love
her heart is the only thing helping her decide
to breathe again, to breathe again

And when she's tired she doesn't sleep
a week since I've seen her eat
She's skin and bones, she's beautiful
no matter what
I wish I could help her see
she means the world to me
But the world, it doesn't mean much to her

She's got this journal filled
with all her black ink guilt
and love is the only thing keeping her alive
she's got her mind made up
that all she needs is love
her heart is the only thing helping her decide
to breathe again, to breathe again


I'll be there to split your lips like when the ice berg hits
and the ship has to break apart
show its teeth and smile

she's got this journal filled
with all her black ink guilt
and love is the only thing keeping her alive
she's got her mind made up
that all she needs is love
and she'll breathe again
and she'll breathe again
and she'll breathe agains
he'll breathe again, again

Fate

Troubled by their separate pasts,
Scared by their futures together,
Two lovers, neither star crossed, or forbidden
Fall in line, hand in hand

Neither tainted nor broken
Like they both seem to believe
Accident’s happen
But not for all the wrong reasons
It’s all for the better in the end

A simple line that changes it all
“Their Fate”, they say together
Believing and a kiss
It seals the deal
They are both happy in their right now forever

If not for their pasts
They would not have a future
Who they were yesterday,
A little different than whom they are today
They will never be the same again

So here’s to their Fate or Destiny
Coincidence or their own making
Just Hope, or keep on believing
Everything will be a fairytale ending

Make a Wish…
Do You Believe in Fate?

What Daddy Doesn't Know

What daddy doesn't know is
how much mommy is alone.
What daddy doesn't know is
how much I have grown.
What daddy doesn't know is
my belief in the Lord.
What daddy doesn't know is
how some days I wish I was never born.
What daddy doesn't know is
that I learned to live, love and laugh.
What daddy doesn't know is
that I have trouble with my past.
What daddy doesn't know is
how much I want to see him.
What daddy doesn't know is
how much I like to win.
What daddy doesn't know is
how another will probably walk me down the aisle.
What daddy doesn't know is
that I'm probably not worth any one's while.
What daddy doesn't know is
that I think about him everyday.
What daddy doesn't know is
that my heart hurts in every way.
What daddy doesn't know is
how I cry myself to sleep some nights.
What daddy doesn't know is
how much I hate it when people fight.
What daddy doesn't know is
how I miss the way it was.
What daddy doesn't know is
that I wish I had the wings of a dove.
What daddy doesn't know is
the peace I sometimes feel in my heart.
What daddy doesn't know is
how I hate how far my friends and I are apart.
What daddy doesn't know is
how I'm alone all the time.
What daddy doesn't know is
how nothing is really mine.
What daddy doesn't know is
how I've been abused physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.
What daddy doesn't know is
that most of the abuse hasn't been family.
What daddy doesn't know is
there are some people who are my world.
And most of all
What daddy doesn't know is
daddy's little girl.

A Beautiful Song

This is a song that Tasha wrote for me. It’s beautiful.
’Nuff said. Here it is.

:: in song with bad guitar accompaniment ::

Oh Sarah, you came and you joined our YG,

I remember calling you butterfly bum girl for the first

three weeks!

Your hair was always different so I couldn’t remember your

name.

Oh, the Idema's bring friends all the time, and most never stay.

I remember being impressed that you kept coming.

So I decided to learn your name.

Oh Sarah,

Saraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Now, I know you!!

And I like you!

And I looooooooove youuuuuu!

Oh, Sarah!

Saraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

I hear you’ve moved away, but I moved first.

So sad as I’m sure you are, I can’t tell the difference

Between Edmonton and Fort Mac at this long distance!

So sister, take heart!

We are never truly apaaaaaart!!

Saraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!

:: lame guitar ending ::

-Natasha Mills, at 10:58pm on August 3rd, 2007

Gone away

I was told that I needed to update this sucker, but at the time I was to angry to type anything, so here I go now....

Things here are... okay. I would love to able to tell you that they were "peachy-keen", But they're not. I am slowly driving myself crazy out here with no one to talk to, and no where to go.

I cannot spend my days in the library or in a mall or in a music store. Not even in a friken coffee shop. Why? because its about 1 half-hour- forty-five minute drive to TOWN. I live in a Hamlet. That's what Anzac is classified as.

It seems that no one out there in E-town or where ever is, emailing me or talking to me, with the exception of Beth *sometimes* and it's hard. I cannot seem to get it right, so I just try harder, and you know what? I crash and burn.

About a week and a half ago(on a Saturday) I passed out in my bathroom on the floor. Why?
Because I was outside the day before for over two hours in the heat and got an sunburn and heat stroke. Then that Saturday I went for a half hour run at 6:30 am and got home and went for a shower. I failed to remember the fact that I should have eaten or drank after. I step out of the show feeling really nauseous and dizzy so I sat down, fighting the urge to throw up or pass out. Well I ended up passing out on the floor for a few minutes before I got up and went and passed out on my bed in the living room.

I'm probably reverting back to where I was about 5-6 months ago, and it sucks.
I'm left alone most of the time, which is fine with me. Most of you know that I am a touch person and I am almost always near a person, well I can't stand being touched right now. The only time I hug someone is the customary hug for thank yous.

I miss everyone. and no one seems to get it. No one seems to get the fact that I am dying out here. I guess I got what I wanted... not to have a heart so that I couldn't feel anything. Well it's mostly working like that. The only thing I feel is pain. not the physical kind either. The kind that come from inside when you miss someone, the kind that makes you feel like you heart is being ripped out.
Yeah fun isn't?

It kinda sucks too when you find out that you best friend is recording an EP around the same time everyone finds out. I am actually really glad for you and your sister. I hope it goes good. But thanks for telling me.

I don't know what else to say or do so.....

Someone please save me from myself...... please talk to me.

"Lock the windows, and bolt the door, cause I've got enough problems without creating more. I feel like I was born, for devastation and reform"